Software engineer and his wife

Husband - hey dear, I am logged in.
Wife - would you like to have some snacks?Husband - hard disk full.
Wife - have you brought the saree.Husband - Bad command or file name.
Wife - but I told you about it in morningHusband - erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.
Wife - hae bhagwan !forget it where's your salary.Husband - file in use, read only, try after some time.
Wife - at least give me your credit card, I can do some shopping.Husband - sharing violation, access denied.
Wife - I made a mistake in marrying you.Husband - data type mismatch.
Wife - you are useless.Husband - by default.
Wife - who was there with you in the car this morning?Husband - system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.
Wife - what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?Husband - the only user with write permission.
Wife - what is my value in your life?Husband - unknown virus detected.
Wife - do you love me or your computer?Husband - Too many parameters..
Wife - I will go to my dad's house.Husband - program performed illegal operation, it will Close.
Wife - I will leave you forever.Husband - close all programs and log out for another User.
Wife - it is worthless talking to you.Husband - shut down the computer.
Wife - I am goingHusband - Its now safe to turn off your computer

Have a nice day!!!

THE MODERN VERSION OF GURU DUTT'S FILM ''KAAGAZ KE PHOOL ''

Kaagaz ke phool

A tribute to the great Guru Dutt

THE MODERN VERSION OF GURU DUTT'S FILM ''KAAGAZ KE PHOOL ''

Guru Dutt is reborn and makes a film, called  'Software ke phool'.
Sahir Ludhianvi Sahab revises his old song for the new venture.
It goes like this (*Poet unknown*):
yeh document, yeh meetings, yeh features ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman, cursors ki duniya,
yeh deadlines ke bhooke, management ki duniya;
yeh Product agar ban bhi jaaye to kya hai?

yahaan ek khilona hai programmer ki hasti,
yeh basti hai murda bug-fixers ki basti,
yahaan par to raises hai, inflation se sasti,
yeh Review agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?

har ek keyboard ghayal, har ek log-in pyaasi 
excel mein uljhan, winword mein udaasi,
yeh office hai ya aalame microsoft ki,
yeh Release agar ho bhi jaaye to kya hai?

jalaa do ise, phoonk daalo yeh monitor,
mere saamne se hataa daalo yeh modem,
tumhaara hai tumhi sambhaalo yeh computer,
yeh Product agar chal bhi jaaye to kya hai?

Try singing these lyrics to the original tune sung by Mohd.Rafi

by Dilip Somaiya

flim fun

Name of hindi flim if they are made by software engineering
1. Hang To Hona Hi Tha !!!!!!!!!!!!


2. Meri Disc Tumhare Paas Hai

3. Aao Chat Kare

4. Programmer No.1

5. Mera Naam Developer

6. Java Wale Job Le Jayenge

7. Hum Apke Memory Mein Rehte Hein

8. Do Processor Baarah Terminal

9. Tera Code Chal Gaya

10. Har Din Jo Mail Karega

11. Network Ke Us Paar

12. Debugging Koi Khel Nahi

13. Jish Desh Mein Bill Gates Rehta Hai

14. Raju Ban Gaya Administrator .!

15. Client Ek Numbari Programmer Dus Numbari

17. Naukar PC Ka

18. 1942 -- A Bug Story

19. Kaho Na Virus Hai

20. Crash Se Crash Tak

21. Haan Maine Bhi Debug Kiya Hai

22. Terminal Apna Login Parayi

23. Mr. Network Lal

Womens Age

Between the ages of 15 - 20 a woman is like Africa.
She is half discovered, half wild .

Between the ages of 20 - 30 a woman is like America.
Fully discovered and scientifically perfect.

Between the ages of 30 - 35, she is like India & Japan.
Very hot, wise and beautiful !!!!!!!!!

Between the ages of 35 - 40 a woman is like France.
She is half destroyed after the war but still desirable.

Between the ages of 40 - 50 she is like Germany.
She lost the war but not the hope.

Between the ages of 50 - 60 she is like Russia.
Very wide, very quiet but nobody goes there.

Between the ages of 60 - 70 a woman is like England.
With a glorious past but no future.

After 70, they become Siberia.
Everyone knows where it is, but no one wants to go there.

Req. :- Please don't take it serious this is only for fun